Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
he fucked my hip out of place.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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