i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
