Cold hands, warm shart.
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
