Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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