We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
