i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I think your dad took our porno
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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