oh god the rape fog is back!
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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