What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
