her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
