Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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