brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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