I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize