Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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