Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
