Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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