Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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