I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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