he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
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