How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
