What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
