yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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