how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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