Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
