Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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