Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
