She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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