I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
