I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
