it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
