Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
