Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
