Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
