Non-Jews are for practice
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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