bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
MIDGETS
????
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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