You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
