I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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