cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
either way he was missing a nipple.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
