I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
