i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
