from now on my penis is your penis
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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