i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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