@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
