well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
