I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
