adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
