Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
