I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
You are a genius and a whore.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
