My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Quick, to the slutcave!
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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