It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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