is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
