Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
