So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
